We have all gone out thinking we were ready to date but here are the real reasons we are all failing out here. Or at least some of the reasons.
1. You got on multiple #DatingApps now you see the same type of people.
#SCARY you swipe swipe swipe "You've got a Match" . Unsure you've seen this profile, clicking open before quickly flashing to conversation equivalent to a soggy wet mayonnaise sand-which,
"nope abort mission ABORT MISSION! (accidentally swipes right.........FML....."Hey Gorgeous, my African Nubian queen of Wakanda maker of honey milk") aghhhhh noooooooooo!!!!
2.There are too many options so you think John 20.6 will hold you up on a potential John 20.7 who just MIGHT wear ankle socks vs tube socks. WTF are we doing guys.
3. The spectrum of #nerd:normalcy ratio when dating creates the world's most unpredictable combinations. Basically the picture below.
This would actually be entertaining........
4. The idea of sex with strangers makes you tired as a true working adult and is scary as a human with so many lurking diseases so you fill it with keto diets, slim snack, fat snacks, cheese fries and or Netflix with lots of alcohol or your choice of coping. (breathe , breathe!!!!)
5. Friends hooking you up with their "other friends" (why they have other friends who knows #nonewfriends) shouldn't be an option since their relationships literally make you want to throw up and quit the human race. Not to mention all the problems they come telling you makes you live on a teeter toter of single vs relationship.
6.They're possibly broke looking for a sugamoma/daddy and trying to put their best foot forward while keeping the fact that they decided to pay their phone bill instead of the light bill just so they could "forget their wallet" while on your date.
7. They're clingy or your trying not to be clingy so either way you are on different wavelengths.
8. Hygiene is non existent. Enough said.
9. You're an ebony/ivory/fat/skinny fantasy possibly or they are totally on the date bc their roommate needs the house to themselves.
10. Or...You're overthinking it because you're Weird AF so you should marry an alien.